Is there something more that I should be doing?!

For the people that, at one point, faithfully read my blog, I'm so sorry that I've sucked at life for the past couple of months. I don't even have a good explanation as to why I stopped writing; just know that I missed the shit out of this blog and the response that I got to it. I can assure you that I'm back for good AND I have an iPhone with the Blogger app so I can blog from anywhere in the world!! (insert snarky remarks about my inability to blog when it's conveniently located on my phone, which might as well be my right hand)

My life is in shambles, per the usual shit that I get myself into. I have come to point where I have no clue what I'm doing with my life, I'm pretty sure I'm having a quarter-life crisis. Before I turned 25, I was quite content to meander through life not having a clue about what I was doing. Now, I'm getting restless and I feel like I should be doing something more. Meh. 

Things that have happened since my last post:

• I met a boy. At first he was great but now he really blows the shit out of me and I can't seem to man up enough to tell him to kick rocks. 
• I went to Ocean City for Memorial Day weekend and survived this 

Seacrets, Ocean City MD

• I got a birthday tattoo, a little present to myself for making it through 25 years without any major problems. It just happened that the tattoo was a gun, on the inside of my bicep because bitches love tickets to the gun show. Finally showed it to my mom, she started crying and told me that it was the equivalent of Mike Tyson's face tattoo and I would never get a real job. She tends to overreact, a lot.
• I've come to realize that it's time for me to distance myself from Bethesda and it's god-awful bar scene. That decision was made when I caught some girls talking shit about me in the bathroom. Mind you, I didn't know these girls from Adam & Eve. According to the lovely ladies, I was having an affair with the married GM of the bar we were in. I waited politely for them to finish snorting their drugs and come out of the handicap stall. I politely introduced myself and asked them to tell me more about my life. Obviously, I had no clue what was going on in my life because I didn't know that I was having an affair with the GM. I'm pretty sure they wanted to melt into the floor. I proceeded to give them a piece of my mind. My mother didn't raise me with questionable morals and there are lines that I refuse to cross because it's just not right (i.e. marriage & people with significant others). The Bethesda bar scene is the most incestuous place I have ever seen and even though everyone is over the age of 21, they all act like they're 16. It's time to venture out in search of a new environment where people can actually act their age. 
• I started going to the gym on a regular basis. Lately, people have been telling me that I look great and they ask me if I've lost weight. Thank you but I haven't lost weight, I just work out more and continue to eat like a horse. They're positive that I've lost weight. Tell me, was I fat before?!

That's all I've got for now but I promise to post way more often than I have been. 

xoxo, 

Me

Womp

That's the best title I could come up with and I'm sticking to it. It's 645 on a Friday night and I'm still in the office but this is honestly the quietest place where I can get stuff done. My blogging skills have been non-existent lately, I've been so busy with work and life that I legit barely have enough energy to make it past my living room and into my bedroom sometimes. I'd just like to point out that it's only the second week in February and I've already had enough drama to last me the next six months. You guys probably don't know this but Bethesda is a very small place. Everyone knows someone is some way, shape or form. People are usually known by first and last name because everyone's friends on Facebook. It's such a small town that it's "affectionately" known as Bethesda High School; you do something on a Friday night, you wake up Saturday morning and whatever you did the night before is being whispered in everyone's ears. It was only a matter of time before word got back me. Let's just clear this up, I'm not sleeping with Ali Baba. I dated his best friend, the Corporal. I'm not down with pulling an LRog move and sleeping with an entire group of friends. I am 24 years old, I'm quite capable of having a friendship with a guy and not sleep with him. And the rumors of me doing blow in the parking garage behind Relic? Totally not original. LRog, you're so silly to think that I don't remember that night from many years ago when I caught you doing the very thing you are accusing me of doing.  If you're going to lie about me, at least be creative because your boring lies really don't do my personality any justice.

Ladies, thank you very much for continuing to spread rumors about me. I especially love when stupid people question me about whether or not the stories are true, as if I was urban legend. The mere fact that you're talking about me, whether good or bad, has put a little extra pep in my step. I would sincerely like to thank you for huddling in the corners of bars and talking about me, you are unknowingly giving me the run of the bar. If you're going to talk about me and spread lies about me, at least be creative and use your imagination. Your boring and recycled lies really don't do my personality any justice. Last but not least, thank you for letting me know that I'm still on your mind. That makes me smile. Just remember that sometimes, karma saves the best for last. 

Anyway, I no longer work at The Box Bar & Grill, where the girls are sexy and the wings are sexier. That's their slogan, what does that even mean?! I don't want sexy wings, I want delicious wings. I'm not going to lie, I had so much fun working there but fun doesn't pay my bills. And I kinda like wearing clothes when I work. It's funny how now, I kinda miss wearing the Under Armor shorts. At least I kept mine. In other news, I work at a sushi restaurant now. I'm a server AND a bartender (cue the Jeffersons's theme song now). I'm doing big things now! As much as I hate working in the service industry, I've always wanted to be a bartender. I have amazing friends that didn't like me working at the Box so they took it upon themselves to find me another job. My boss, Mo, is actually someone I've known for a couple of years just from going to a certain hole in the wall bar. He would always go there with the bartender from Tommy Joe's, who coincidentally enough used to date LRog (that's how I met her). Anyway, Mo told me that he was going to start me off serving and then transition me to bar training as soon as he could. He was good on his word and I've been training with him for the past couple of shifts. It's literally been wearing me out because I've been working my day job and then some nights I've been going in for training after. By the time I get home, it's well passed last call and I'm exhausted. I have my first official bar shift next Saturday night. I think Mo is crazy for throwing me to the wolves  like that, I don't think I'm ready but I'm going to do it and I'm going to run train on it. 

I'm tempted to go out tonight but I didn't get home until 430 this morning (that's a story for another night). I have big girl things to do tomorrow like get my taxes done and go to the gym. Womp. 

Kids these days have lost their minds

I actually had a good post to write but I was totally distracted by these stupid bitches that walked in. I'm sitting at Starbucks, attempting to do my homework. See how well that's going for me?! So anyway these stupid bitches were obnoxious, "I'm in high school and I own the world" kid of obnoxious; they were the kind of obnoxious that makes me want to high five people in the face. 

So anyway, these little (I only use that word because I'm so mature and shit) girls were so loud that everyone pretty much stare at them. This one girl, Little Miss Hot Body, was talking about how she didn't have any money and her parents were being such assholes by not giving her any. She went on to say that her dad had given her $400 last month and yesterday he gave her $315 for the month. She was bitching and moaning like it was the end of the world. Newsflash: you could get a job, bitch. 

That brings me to my next point...are all kids like that now?! If so, what the hell is going in the world?!? I swear on all that is holy that my children will never be like that. They will get a job as soon as they are old enough to work. There will be no discussion about it. My parents didn't raise me to be a little freeloading bitch. Now don't get me wrong, my dad would give me money every now and then but I've had a job every single day since I turned 16. I don't need a job and at times when I've been so frustrated with whatever I was doing, my dad wouldn't hesitate to let me know that. That's all fine and dandy but my thing is that I don't want to have to justify to anyone how I spend my money. Had I ever quit working and just relied on Daddy for money, I would have had to check with him before I spent it. I don't like having to justify shit so I kept working. I also kept working because it gave me something to do and it allowed me to meet people, most of  them were stupid but sometimes, you gotta take the good with the bad. Anyway, I said all that to say that if these kids think that they're going to be able to coast through college and life after that then they're very wrong. Their cushy little bubble will pop the minute that they step foot on that college campus their freshmen year. The real world isn't going to baby them. Bitches like that are going in the burn book.

Anywho, I'm thinking that I should do a future post that's a letter to my future children. I'll show it to them once they leave for college. I always see parents with their kids now and I actually get a little jealous because they look so happy. I know that I have no reason to be jealous but I still can't help it. It's weird. 

Also, I made a new section at the top of my blog for quotes that make me happy. I'm kinda glad that today is Sunday. I know that it's Fall and we're in October but it got unseasonably cold really fast. It's currently 40 degrees outside. The other day it was 70 and I was wearing flip-flops. I wasn't ready for this cold weather just yet but it's a good thing that I always have my Uggs ready and waiting. We play the Jets tonight. If we win this game, we'll get a higher ranking in the AFC and we'll most likely be right behind the Bills. The Steelers are now irrelevant to me because they suck. 

You should listen to this song because it's awesome. It also doesn't hurt that this guy graduated magna cum laude from St. John's. Sexy and smart?! I'm going to have his babies. 

It's a day for humping, confusion & me quitting smoking

So I'm confused and I would really appreciate your input on this. I was looking at my blog stats and traffic sources. I never really look at that shit and for some reason, I was very curious today. I will have you know that Christen's blog and Shane's blog are my top referring URLs and that makes me very happy. Thank you both for being awesome! There were some other URLs, I clicked on them but it said that there was an error and I had no idea why. I wasn't confused about that but I was, however, confused about this part...one of the referring links was some website that I've never heard of and I'm definitely not a member of, gothise.com. WTF is that shit, you ask? Well apparently it's a place for alternative people. Why is that site referring people to my blog? Don't get me wrong, I'll take the referrals but please help me understand this where this is coming from. Another point of confusion: this website is apparently also referring people to my blog. WTF? It's a clothing site based out of China. How the fuck is this happening?!? Either way, I'll take the referrals.

So who wants to find me another job? I am so freaking tired of working in that damn restaurant. I just about punch myself in the ovaries every time I have to go in for a shift.

Things I am willing to do:    

• yard work
• babysitting
• chauffeur
• assassin
• street walker

Things I'm not willing to do:

• wait tables
• wait tables
• work in a restaurant
• wait tables

So as you can see, I'm pretty flexible and open to any sorts of jobs that you guys may have for me! Even though it's not my main source of income, I can't quit the restaurant until I actually have another job. I've gotten into the swing of the whole two jobs and school thing so if I didn't find another job, I'd have way too much time on my hands and that always leads to bad things. Once I finally quit, talking shit about everyone that works there is fair game. I will have a legit fucking burn book and it's going to be hilarious. This time when I leave that place, there will be no going back to work there because I'm bored or I missed it. This time, I mean it when I say that I'm done. I'm quite tempted to not show up for work tomorrow just because. 

Anyway, I'm craving sushi real bad right now. It's kind of a sick obsession that I have. 

In really important news, I haven't had a cigarette since about 3:30PM yesterday. Sitting in traffic on my way home from work really sucked because I did't have any cigarettes. I finished the pack yesterday and I decided to just quit cold turkey. I've tried to do it before but something's always come up and I've made excuses about it not being a good time. I've decided that it's always a good time to quit smoking.

Wish me luck!