First day of school and then some

I've been dreading this day since finals last semester. Yesterday was the first day of Fall classes but today, my friends, I start class. I honestly wish that you could have seen my face when I woke this morning. I had barely gotten out of bed and the day was already off to a shitty start. I don't think that I've ever mentioned this but I loathe, abhor, despise school with a flaming fiery passion. It is the bane of my existence. Keep in mind that I don't go to a fancy schmancy university like Georgetown. No no, I go to a community college because I was too lazy to get my act together and fill out college applications my senior year (they're all still sitting in a shoe box, unopened). I had no desire to go to college right after high school, I wanted to backpack around the country, alone, at 18 years old. True story. I wanted to be like Jack Kerouac, without a car. When I told my parents that, they laughed in my face. At the time, I was furious with them for not letting me do it but looking back on it, they were totally justified (I just admitted that they were right and for that reason alone, I will never let them read this blog). I was just barely 18 and I wanted to backpack around the country. Seriously?!? Anyway, half way through my senior year, Newsweek came out with an article about students taking a gap year between high school and college. The reasoning was that most people that young weren't quite ready for the responsibility that comes with moving out of their parents' house and essentially being on their own for the first time blah blah blah. I shit myself when I saw the article. I wrote my parents a 50 page email, only because I knew they wouldn't sit still long enough to let me say what I had to say and listen without laughing. When my dad read the email, he was incredibly proud of me because it was so well written and documented. I backed up every argument and fact. I wish that I still had it somewhere because I was actually really proud of it as well. Long story short, they made me sign up for classes at the community college around the corner...no gap year for Mackenzie. In hindsight, had I taken one, I probably never would have signed up for classes after that. Whatever. My academic career has been nothing less that absolutely horrible. I have been on academic restriction or probation since Spring of 2007. When I went through my transcripts, I was actually ashamed of myself for fucking up so damn bad. I'm a smart girl, I really am but sometimes, I do the stupidest fucking shit ever. I made my bed and now I need to lay in it.

A little relevant background info...my mom graduated from high school in Paris (because she was fancy, duh) so when I was old enough to start pre-school, my parents put me in the French school in Manhattan, where i was born. The one thing that my parents never argued about or disagreed on was the fact that I would be bilingual. Honestly, I am so incredibly grateful of the fact that I speak French and I wouldn't trade that for anything in the world. When things weren't working out with the parentals, my mom and I moved to MD when I was three. I, of course, was too young to take the transfer test so they just transferred me to the Lycee (fancy name for the French school) in Bethesda. I stayed there until the end of my freshman year and then I was politely asked to leave before they expelled me...oops. I figured that it was no big deal, I would just transfer to a public school, which is what I always wanted. I also figured that it couldn't be worse than the Lycee, also known as Stepford depending on who you ask. I have a big personality and I like doing what I want to do when I want to do it. I refuse to be put in a box. In fact, I just don't fix in a box and the only label that fits me is Mackenzie. The school wanted me to conform and that shit just wasn't fucking happening so I started acting out. That's when I became a huge issue for them and they just wanted to get rid of me. They essentially bribed me into leaving quietly by not putting an expulsion on my record. Going from the Lycee to a kinda ghetto public school was the biggest culture shock of my life, I felt like I needed a fucking passport to go to school. I hated it so much that I went home and cried every day for a good two months. I had made my bed and I needed to lay it. I changed schools at the beginning of my sophomore year so I was definitely the new girl. Everybody had grown up together and they were so close knit that I didn't have a chance at being friends with them. It wasn't until the second semester of that year that I made friends with some of the coolest guys I know, we're still friends to this day. I was put in Spanish 2 first, I walked into the classroom and sat down. I walked out 10 minutes into the class because bitch was teaching the students remedial fucking Spanish and she was making mistakes that no one caught but me. I went to the guidance counselor and he switched me into Spanish 3. It just so happened that that was the class with all the football players; most girls would have creamed themselves but I was terrified because they were big as shit. I walked into the classroom and I might as well have been a gazelle, completely unprotected in the Serengeti just based on the way the guys were looking at me. The teacher handed me a 30 page packet that we were supposed to work on for the next two days, I finished it in 10 minutes. I gave it back to her and from that point on, she hated me. The entire packet was correct. She emailed my counselor and told him that I would be her TA instead of an actual student; she made me work with the football players because they were struggling with life. They were all hitting on me and kept trying to get me to come to parties with them. Sorry, I think I'll pass because I'm not about to let you run train on  me. We all became such good friends to the point where I would come home from work and some of them would be sitting on the couch hanging out with my mom. The worst part was that she cooked for them!!! She never did that shit for me but she sure as hell did it for them. Her reasoning was that they were active growing boys and they needed food. REALLY?!?! To this day some of them ask me if they can go to her house so that she can cook for them. No fuckfaces, she's not cooking for you anymore. Anyway, we all became really close and that made the girls at school HATE me. That was fine with me because I hated them too, they were all stupid fucking bitches. They made my last three years of high school a living hell because they were so mean. It wasn't even like they Mean Girls kind of mean, they were ghetto so they would physically lash out. I don't know how I managed to not get my ass beat at all while I was there, Lord knows I was worried about it. To this day, they're all still stupid fucking bitches and I'm not. Nor am I fat, with 3 kids and 3 different baby daddies that are all in jail...that's way more than I can say for them. I'm actually laughing as I write this because they used to get so mad that they would try and provoke me but I wouldn't react; I never cared enough to do so. All the girls thought that I was a slut and they made it a point to tell that to anyone that would listen. I never slept with any of my boys; everyone assumed that I had slept with all of them because we hung out so much. This is totally not where I was going with this post...


Anyway, the song that I woke up to on the first day of my senior year was by Avenue D. I remember the day like it was yesterday. My alarm went off at 630 and that song started playing. I started dancing on my bed because it was the first day of my senior year, who wouldn't be excited about that?! While most girls were probably getting their cutest outfit together, I was looking for the cleanest pair of dirty sweatpants on my floor.   I wore sweats and a holey tshirt on my first day of school . You know how I love to keep it classy! The guys were coming to pick me up since I was way too cool to take the school because I was a senior, duh. I was running late, per the usual, and I forgot my wallet at home. I didn't realize it until lunch, when I was, of course, starving. One of the guys bought me lunch in the cafeteria because it was raining and no one wanted to go out. I was standing in line talking to him when out of nowhere this hoodrat, nasty ass bitch tries to start shit with me. Really?! It's the first day of school, couldn't she at least have waited until the second day to start outrightly hating me? I just looked at her because I was hungry and grumpy and I really wasn't in the mood to play games. She didn't like the fact that I wasn't going to respond so she poured chocolate milk over my head. It got real quiet in the cafeteria, the way it does right before a fight breaks out; everyone thought I was going to beat her ass. I just started laughing at her, as chocolate milk drips down my face and shirt. That pissed her off even more. She went to swing and Mike stepped in between us because he knew that she would most likely put me in the hospital. Apparently the drama was all because of him. They had been hooking up all through the summer and about a week before school started, he just stopped talking to her completely. When she saw us together, she thought that I was the reason for his lack of communication with her. Bitch, please. If you were relevant or even worth it, he would have held your damn hand while he walked into school and made a point to let everyone know that you were his girl. He was the star quarterback so he was kind of a big deal (back then). He was just fucking her because no one better was around and she refused to acknowledge that. She was actually stupid enough to think that he liked her, poor girl. Mike took me home after lunch because I was gross, I had milk everywhere and I was constantly suppressing the urge the vomit because I hate milk.  I honestly remember the day like it was yesterday and it was the worst first day of school ever. The song that woke me up...

I really liked that song because it was funny as shit. That was the song that woke me up this morning as well and I immediately felt like I was going back to high school. I shot out of bed and yanked my iPod off the damn dock and threw it onto my bed. My heart was pounding and I had such an uneasy feeling. I tend to be dramatic sometimes. I immediately had to start thinking happy thoughts and this is the only one that came to mind...

You know you love that shit! The only saving grace about this semester is that I'm taking one class and it starts at 12:30. There should be no reason as why I oversleep or whatever other excuse I mastermind to justify not going to class. The other good thing about it is that I usually get to school early so I can sit around and blog before class (I know you're happy about that!).

School really isn't as bad as I make it out to be. If only I got paid to attend classes...